Are you Sirius??

HEY NOW!!!
I really must be the only shmuck who wakes up for work at 3am just to get my balls broken by idiot celebrities, porn stars, and my dumb coworkers all day. It's not bad enough that i have a good friend in the hospital thanks to a botched suicide attempt. I need Bababooey busting my chops all morning with ferkockteh Mets trivia? Ma-Ma-Monkey. That horse-toothed jackass needs to just shut up and produce. I almost wanna fire him just so he understands what a great life I've created for him. He wouldn't last a second anywhere else. He screws up my show all morning long and then has the nerve to sheepishly stick his head in my office and say "Sorry Boff." Just do your job!! Is it really that much to ask? Good God! Ra-Ra-Retard. I've already got one martian on the payroll; I don't need any others. I'm surrounded by baffoons and dopey broads ALL DAY and all my staff can figure out to do is to emulate these wackos.


And another thing...how hard is it to heat up a baked potato and bring it to me? This really shouldn't require an ivy league education. Stupid K.C. couldn't do it. That idiot Grillo invented new ways to screw up this simple task. Hey Dopes!! It's a fuckin baked potato! Not that hard. Throw the fuckin thing into a microwave and bring it to me sometime between 11am and 1pm.

Dinner with Beth was nice as usual. Had my half glass of wine. I still hate to drink heavily during the week. I like to wait until the weekend when i can really get crazy and enjoy a FULL glass in the confines of my sell-out, Hamptons getaway spot. Fuckin Artie. He could be enjoying all of this too. I actually haven't been able to get him out of my mind all day. I hope he can get the help that he needs. Poor bastard. All I've been able to think about is his poor mother and sister. That's gotta be incredibly hard. I hope he fully recovers and gets his head straight. Fuckin guy.

Well, its 7pm already which means i need to lie down so i can repeat all of this foolishness again tomorrow.